Continuing Ugh

It's been 6 days now since I've been off the couch. The vertigo, dizziness and nausea have made it such that I don't last long sitting upright let alone standing. I don't feel safe driving either, changes in direction cause me to experience vertigo and get a bit disoriented.

I went to the doctor Monday because it felt like my kidneys were going to explode. I didn't sleep at all Sunday night because the pain was so bad. I watched the sun come up and called Stanford as soon as they opened at 8am. They suggested I see my GP, so I got an appointment with him at 11:30am. Wendy left work to drive me up where the doctor drew blood and some other fluid as well as poking and prodding me. All the labs came back normal. At least that meant I could take Advil to tide me over. My only guess is that it is a pretty severe muscle cramp. It's not as bad today but still annoying.

I'm getting sick and tired of feeling sick and tired. I feel useless. I haven't worked, haven't shopped, haven't walked the dog, haven't even really been out of the house. It takes most of my energy and willpower just to get out of bed in the morning. I've been reading other CML survivor experiences and it seems that Gleevec wreaks havoc on you for about 6 months before things even out and you start to feel normal again.

Since Wendy is no longer pregnant, we'd planned on hiking, camping and boating a lot this summer. That hasn't exactly worked out. We've been out once on the boat since July 4th and I can barely make it around the block right now let alone do a hike.

On a much more positive note, Wendy and I have received several cards in the mail that have made our day. One of them told jokes and one of them sang to us. It's so nice to know that people are thinking about us. In addition, my mother-in-law sent us two yoga mats and a yoga DVD from Gaiam. I can't wait to feel good enough to try and fold myself into a pretzel.

The father of one of my best friends from high school happened to be passing through town this morning and I drug myself out of bed "early" (9am) to have breakfast with him and his wife. It was great catching up, I haven't spoken with him or my friend in over 8 years. He had several pictures of his son's wife and new child. They looked very happy in the pictures. I couldn't help but be a little jealous.